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On May 8th, North Carolina voted and added a marriage amendment to the Constitution. The marriage amendment was passed to protect North Carolina families. To save them from the homosexuals, I guess. Honestly, I’m not really sure. North Carolina already had a law on the books that prevented gay marriages from being recognized by the state. I’ve been too angry, upset, regretful, and rueful to write about it well.

I was shocked by the majority of North Carolinians. I was grateful to the metro area where I lived that voted against. I had too many words. I had too few. What I finally realized is that North Carolina did not strip away my marriage. It stripped away another opportunity for me to have my marriage recognized. I am no less married today than I was 8 days ago.

Silver Berry

I got this recipe from The Bartender’s Guide published by Parragon, which can be purchased here.

1 oz Raspberry Vodka

1 oz Creme de Cassis

1 oz Triple Sec

Shake all over ice. Pour into a martini glass.


When I first started working with this drink, I thought something was off. So I reduced the creme de cassis, that didn’t work. I reduced the triple sec, that didn’t work. I added more creme de cassis to make it fruitier that didn’t work. I dropped both the creme de cassis and the triple sec to make it stronger, that didn’t work. Every variation I tried this drink kept coming up short to this one, which is when I realized this drink was how I felt about marriage.

The ingredients blend beautifully and surprisingly. Any attempt to make it more or better often harms and not helps the drink. If you look at the ingredients themselves, the drink seems really sweet, but they come out softer and harmonious than expected. Like a marriage, the drink is strong but not overbearing. It is not the strength of the drink that one tastes, but the sweet, the light, the balanced. It looks beautiful, but attainable, simple in its wonder. You don’t want too many. One is perfect. If we can all have marriages as perfect as this drink, balanced, sweet, strong, and beautiful, we would all be so lucky.


Raspberry Vodka: $15 per 750 mL bottle

Creme de Casis: $10 per 750 mL bottle of Vodka

Triple Sec: $3.50 per 750 mL bottle

Total Cost: $18.50

Cost per drink:

Raspberry vodka: $0.60

Creme de Cassis:  $o.40

Triple Sec: $0.14

Total cost per drink: $1.14

Until next time, may your marriage be as perfect as this drink, and, as always, happy and safe drinking.