I know that it’s been like 2 months since I last updated. Sorry for that.
So, what have I been up to? I went to Texas for two weeks and did not bring my laptop. Suffice to say that trip was many things. I was like the star of a movie about friends. Nothing really happened to me, while lots of things happened around me.
The day that I flew to Texas, I got into law school at the University of North Carolina. Today I finish my second full week of class.
Law school is intense. It’s basically like high high school. You have a locker. Required classes that the administration puts you in. You don’t have any say. You have the same core classes with a handful of people. You don’t really know anyone. It’s like freshman year of high school with bank accounts and a real ID that says you can drink.
I’m resorting back to parts of high school Brett with the intelligent edits of college Brett. It’s a weird place. I rock between confidence of career goals and future successes and the honesty that starting law school is like starting college, and I am open to the opportunities that the program that I’m doing affords me. Ultimately, I don’t know. I know that what I’m doing opens a lot of doors in two different fields that I’m really interested in. Although, I’m asking myself, “Why did you go to law school?” I certainly applied and enrolled for practical rather than noble goals. Is that enough? Does it matter? Will I be like Elle Woods who woke up one day, decided to go to law school, and saved Brooke Windham from a murder charge?
There are so many opportunities to invalidate myself and we’re only two weeks in. Including my masters, I still have four years minus two weeks to go! I’m glad I have a forum to vent my insecurities. To all of you reading, thanks. Although most of you readers would be subject to my phone calls if I didn’t have the blog.
Because of all of these ridiculous insecurities, I’ve allowed my inner 19 year old to take of reigns for my drinking habit. Rather than Manhattans or chocolate martinis with jalapeno vodka, I’ve been drinking rum and cokes. Seriously. My 19 year old has taken control and will not let go. I’ve gotten sick more often from drinking rum and cokes then I have all year. It’s like I’ve forgotten how to drink. I am not a fan.
I need to take the reigns back from my 19 year old. I need to convince myself that I am a strong, capable, intelligent, smart, 26 year old who has done things and is capable of this thing called graduate school. It’s school. It’s not like I’m having to slay a dragon with my bare hands. But until I feel more convinced, I guess there are rum and cokes.
As always, happy and safe drinking.